Total Turtle Tea Trolley

Water is running over the pebbly path in thin, foam-edged streams as the Total Turtle Tea Trolley makes its way forward through the rain. The Tea Turtles are, of course, amphibious, and water runs off their shells and down their hunter-green waterproof duck dust ruffles. The Tea Trolley is protected by a towering yellow-and-white striped golf umbrella, the tips of its ribs secured to the Trolley by thin monofilament guylines, and the water rolls off it in great sheets.

The Trolley is headed towards the pond, but the Chief Tea Turtle knows that there is no one there. Rather, the Chief Tea Turtle hopes to be discovered on the way, by the creature known as the Rainocious Rhinoceros. On a rainy day, the RR will lie in wait for the Trolley, and ambush it. At the very least, he will chase it, and the Trolley will accelerate as quickly as the Under Tea Turtles’ little legs will allow. But at a certain stage, they will slow down, allow the Trolley to be caught, and all will share in the tea and treats. It is a dance that has gone on as long as there have been rhinoceroses in the metmow, and the participants would no sooner make an appointment to have tea than throw a chess game in two moves by fool’s mate. Quite simply, it would not be fun.

Today, the Trolley is carrying a silver salver with devilled eggs made with Durkee’s Dressing and Hungarian paprika, golden-brown palmiers, whitefish salad, and a salad of chopped tomato, parsley, and minced Sevillano olives. The tea is a malty pure Assam, in a sun-yellow pinch-neck teapot with a craquelure glaze, enclosed in an insulated reflective aluminized tea cosy.

From behind a tree, the Rainocious Rhinoceros charges. “Come back, my plated friends!” he cries. The Trolley speeds up, the Chief Tea Turtle ahead of the Trolley by two lengths, his legs a blur. The Chief Tea Turtle is exhilarated, his little heart close to bursting, until he hears the cries of the Under Tea Turtles and knows that the rhino is closing fast. Suddenly, the rhino bursts from behind him, spins around, and blocks the path. The Chief Tea Turtle stops, and collapses onto his knees, He can hear the Trolley slipping and  shuddering to a halt behind him. And the Rainocious Rhinoceros, directly in front of him, smiles, and asks, “Might I have some tea?”

This entry was posted on Monday, March 29th, 2010 at 8:27 am and is filed under metmow. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.